How to Get Together Again If Your Ex is Living Somewhere Else

By Jenna James

Couple living somewhere else

Your relationship is split and your locations split. You can get together again if your ex is living someone else.

After a break-up, your ex may need to do something dramatic in order to move on or dull the pain. Sometimes that means filling the void with a rebound relationship, but often it means totally changing one's environment. So it is very possible that your ex has made a big move in order to help deal with the break-up. This, no doubt is a big obstacle to overcome, but there are tips on how to get together again if your ex is living somewhere else.

Before you quit your job, move across the country to chase your ex down, or make a break up mistake, you must assess your ex's possible motives for leaving. Only you know if a move is a permanent "goodbye, never again." In that case, it's best to take healthy steps to move on. I give great advice on that in my book, if that turns out to be the case for you.

For many of you, this is not the case. If your ex had other reasons for being unhappy when you were together such as trouble at work or issues with his or her family, your ex might be using this break-up as a jumping point or a way to create a new beginning. The big things in life are what tend to propel us into new endeavors that would've been overlooked if we allowed ourselves to remain in a comfort zone. So for your ex, this may be what he or she needed.

If you sense these other factors played a part in your break-up, a dramatic move is a common reaction. That doesn't make it easy for you to rekindle the relationship, but it means it's entirely possible. You can get back an ex who doesn't love you.

It's important that you retain communication with your ex in this instance. "Out of sight; out of mind," as the saying goes. So even if it means being friends instead of lovers, it's important that you remain in contact. It's also important to give your ex appropriate space. Let your ex experience a new place. The last thing you want to do is let yourself get jealous. After all, if you truly love your ex, you want the best for him or her. So do what you can to maintain your cool.

...appeal to your ex's emotions and incite nostalgia AND you want to hint at possible future plans.

The best way to get back together again is to do two things simultaneously. You want to appeal to your ex's emotions and incite nostalgia AND you want to hint at possible future plans. Not big, glorious plans of running off to Europe together, but small plans. Perhaps a day trip to wherever your ex is living or plans to get together for that Broadway show you've always wanted to see. It's important to simply keep yourself within reach, to ensure that there WILL be times to see each other.

Simultaneously, you'll want to drop occasional allusions to things you used to do together. Say things that you know will encourage your ex to miss you. If you two always went to a particular wine tasting together, mention going to it with your friend or co-worker. Were you regular tailgaters at football games? Talk about the fun things that happened last week when you went to the game with all of your friends.

By maintaining a nice balance of nostalgia and forecasting, you're not only keeping your ex within reach despite the distance, you're also keeping your ex emotionally invested. It may be only in a small way, but as long as that door is still open, there is the ability for your ex to walk back through it.

Your goal is not to convince your ex to move back or invite you move to where he or she is. The goal is to indirectly encourage your ex to decide he or she wants you back. You want your ex to put the pieces together and realize he or she really DOES want to back with you. Once that realization is in place, your ex will be the one to do what it takes to make that happen. You just have to be open and ready to receive.

In the end, it is a little harder to get your ex back once a big move has been made, but it's still totally possible especially if you know what to do. The tricks on how to get together again if your ex is living somewhere else are compiled together along with a lot of other great advice in my ex back book. You'll learn things that most people never expected to be true and how to use this knowledge to put your relationship back together. Learn more about the book Bait Him Back or Bait Her Back by clicking the links.

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